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My friend Dave is a tough guy. He served in the French Foreign Legion. He hates bullies. One night we were wandering around town looking for fun. We walked towards the only place open - a grotty club that no longer exists. A small, drunk student was giving the head bouncer a bit of lip. The Doorman was huge. He got angry with the kid, started wailing in heavily on him. Before you could say "WTF" Dave has the bouncer in a headlock. Time stands still. The other bouncers rush out but are stopped in their tracks by what they see. I grab the student's mate, picked up the drunk kid and carried him to a waiting taxi, dropped the driver some cash, told him to take them home. I walked over to Dave who still has the bouncer in a headlock and calmly said, let's go in and have a drink. He releases the bouncer and we walk into his club. We stayed until closing time. Drinking, dancing and chatting to a few girls - Not a peep out of the bouncer or his mates. Now... Picture a guy called Colin. 30 something. Thin, weedy, loves Cheerios and still lives at home with his mum. The hardest thing he's ever done was to jump into his local swimming pool with his eyes closed. Do you think if Colin saw my friend Dave in a bar he'd walk over, and call him out? Unless Colin was clinically insane, he wouldn't. But put Colin behind a computer screen and he becomes... IRONTROLL Fingers of steel, the speed of a cheetah, the balls of an elephant. ✅Calling out anyone. ✅Upsetting people. ✅Insulting the world. Why's he doing this? Because he can. He's hidden. He's safe from retribution and because he's hungry. Colin's favourite dish is "shit au stirring." Made up of a mix of tears, upset, anger and frustration - given off by folks, who get upset by his insults, name calling and worse. I know it's hard but don't feed them. Don't let them consume your energy. The more you feed them, the hungrier they become. They won't go away until you're completely exhausted. They can remove your will to live or at least massively piss you off. The only cure once you've been bitten, is exile in a 5,000 year old secret monastery in Tibet.🤣 Don't feed the trolls.
Carve your name on hearts, not tombstones. A legacy is etched into the minds of others and the stories they share about you. Shannon Alder. "I set goals but never get to achieve them." "I don't bother to set goals because, well, you know..." "The goals I set don't do anything for me." If you've said this or something similar, I get it. You're way ahead of most people because you know the benefits of goals. You know how they can bring meaning into your life. But you don't have one that lights your fire. You're doing well financially. You're in a good place. But there's something missing. A spark, something that jump starts your day. A legacy. Something you leave behind. A legacy doesn't have to be a massive inheritance or huge property portfolio. It's something important to you, that you'd want to leave behind for your family or community or the world. A legacy can be scholarships, art, a sustainable business, a charity, a book created from the blood, sweat and tears of your experience. It's your choice. Something YOU wished you'd had growing up or an ideal you'd like to live by. And help others do the same. Emem Uko says: “It's the journey that matters, soak it in. Learn lessons out of it. Impact positively so that if you never get to your destination, at least you'd leave a legacy to be remembered.” The legacy you leave behind can be the story of your efforts to make the world a better place. Your actions might spur others to continue your work, long after you've gone. It could be the personal standards you set for yourself and your team. It could be the way you decide to live your life. “No legacy is so rich as honesty.” William Shakespeare. People talk about what they'd like folks to say at their funeral. I prefer to think about what people will say about you YEARS later. Take a moment to think of the billions of lives gone, many had an impact but no one remembers, no one's carrying on in their footsteps. You don't want that, do you? It all starts with you taking time to think about future you. What do you want to be known for? What do you want to leave behind? How do you want to be remembered? Once you know, you'll know. And setting goals will no longer be a problem because you'll have something worth aiming for. The memory of you. If you have no clue where to start, message me today.
Have you ever noticed how two people can experience the same event but react differently? It’s because our mindset is like a lens we look throuhgh and see the world. And just like your phone, if the lens is dirty or cracked, the picture comes out blurry. Your mindset shapes your reality more than you know. It can change how you see challenges, how you act with others, and even HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT YOURSELF! But here’s the thing: You have the power to change your mindset. Choosing to have a more positive, open mindset, you can start to see: opportunities where others see obstacles, solutions where others see problems, and possibilities where others see limitations. It’s not always easy, but it’s doable and worth it. So, next time you’re faced with a challenge, swap lenses. Ask yourself, “What can I learn from this?” or “How can this help me grow?” You'll be surprised at how much your view of things can change, and how much your life can change as a result.
Have you ever noticed how two people can experience the same event but react differently? It’s because our mindset is like a lens we look throuhgh and see the world. And just like your phone, if the lens is dirty or cracked, the picture comes out blurry. Your mindset shapes your reality more than you know. It can change how you see challenges, how you act with others, and even HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT YOURSELF! But here’s the thing: You have the power to change your mindset. Choosing to have a more positive, open mindset, you can start to see: opportunities where others see obstacles, solutions where others see problems, and possibilities where others see limitations. It’s not always easy, but it’s doable and worth it. So, next time you’re faced with a challenge, swap lenses. Ask yourself, “What can I learn from this?” or “How can this help me grow?” You'll be surprised at how much your view of things can change, and how much your life can change as a result.
I was out walking the dog with my eight-year-old, Raf. I started to feel angry as soon as we'd left the house, because he started asking "stupid" questions. His first one was, “if you drew a line from the Sun to the Earth would there be someone standing under it?” Followed by, “Did I know anyone who could walk on water?” Why couldn’t he just walk quietly and enjoy the moment? My son was just being a child, bouncing along beside me, asking whatever questions came to him. It’s a warm night and as we walked I relaxed and smiled. I answered his questions as best as I could. Oh to be a kid again, to see the world with an open, innocent mind. He’d never walked with me this late before. It was a new experience. The stars are out, he’s happy, the dog’s behaving. My mood changed. I let go and smiled as we walked. It’s easy to get caught up in your own shit, your own crappy inner world. Not paying attention to the needs of others. My son just wanted to talk to me. But most of all I think he enjoyed being out with me, just walking. Me, him and the dog. If you’re a dad, spend more time with your kids when they're young. Because this innocence doesn't last long. It's gone before you know it.
The world owes you nothing, in business. I've seen a massive upsurge about things not being fair in business. It's time to stop bleating, moaning and bitching about it because BUSINESS ISN'T FAIR. You might work 26 hours a day 8 days a week and still fail. A minute number of entrepreneurs might get it right first time and hit pay dirt rea; quicK. They are SUPER rare. The majority of us have to grind it out. You might take more wrong turns than most before you find the right road. The one thing that is guaranteed to hold you back... is you spending time complaining how "it isn't fair " that you've been in business for 5 minutes and aren't famous yet. If that's you, give up and go home. I know this is true because I spent years in one company moaning - mainly to myself - about how my progress had stalled and I wasn't moving up the ladder. Sadly for me, it was too late when I realised that the reason I'd stalled was I hadn't put enough effort into promoting myself, doing more than my "job" and adding more value. Bitter pill swallowed. Lesson learned. Today I'm self employed and I'm doing the work. No one really gives a shit about your problems because they've got enough challenges getting through the day. Before you "invest" in the next shiny thing that comes your way, ask yourself this question: "Am I prepared to do my best to make it work for me." If your honest answer is "no" hide your credit card. Don't fall for the online marketers bait. There isn't a business model online or off that doesn't require a massive effort to grow and prosper. Before you buy any course, training or coaching package, get your mindset out of entitlement mode and be prepared to hit level one hard.
We delight in the beauty of the butterfly, but rarely admit the changes it has gone through to achieve that beauty. Maya Angelou. If you help a butterfly escape it's chrysalis - you'll kill it. The butterfly must make its own way out. It has to fight. Some people see this as a metaphor for the struggles we need to overcome in order to grow. Most don't. They focus only on the beauty of the butterfly. People don't want to know about the changes it's had to go through in order to make it out into the world. Today we look for ways to get instant success. Celebs and other successful people "must" have found an easy way in. A hack or special handshake that got them to where they are today. A horrible insult many successful women hear is that "she must have slept her way to the top." The haters say this because they don't want to know about the years of hard work it took to reach number one. There is no such thing as overnight success. The unknown person who wins "Britain's Got Talent" has been practising anddoing gigs to tiny audiences for years before their chance came along. We don't see that. We see that last week she was working as a "waitress in a cocktail bar." And today they've signed a huge record deal. You can become successful if you put your mind to it. You might not have the talent to win a reality TV contest - but you could become the best sales person in your region or the mechanic everyone wants to fix their cars. It's a simple process. Do the work, learn from your mistakes, do more work. Learn, study, work. Rinse and repeat. Never stop learning and never stop working. Sadly most won't. Too much like hard work. Did you know the world's most successful people, are lifelong learners, they constantly set and work towards their goals. That's right, even those at the top of the tree have goals and dreams they want to achieve. How about you?
